Haunting by the past.

1 year has passed. I can still remember cleary where i was last year. dreamt of her yesterday. This incident has haunt me through out the year. i thought i have forgotten but yesterday it came to my dream. Im not going to recall or write the bad memories here. what past has gone away long ago.

well... I have seem the dark side of the world. I promise myself to work hard for my future so that i won't let my generation ahead suffer this like how i did.

"Daddy will make a good path for you".

My Taiwan tour is coming to the end soon.

Yes Jerms. 2 more months.

I'm not planning to do anything or say anything with her. we will just remain as friend. :)
Just finish my Hongkong show. is a show regarding HK's GFS. was pretty good. ending was as normal. lovers got altogether. saving lives and etc.

Left two more months in Taiwan. I felt it was a good stay for me. learned alot things that i cant learn in sg. It was about living away from family and loves one. I know mummy is very upset when Im away from home. i do miss home too. there was one night my mum called and she was crying. she was abit drunk at the moment and told me all the things from her heart. she told me how bad she felt. not being able to give my brothers and me a good life or even a happy family and her wrong decision to marry my daddy. I don't blame mummy for that because it was dad who left this family. she also said how sad she was when i come taiwan because i need the money to support myself and when she heard apple left me because of the rich kid. I told her not to take the blame on herself. It was my decision to come taiwan. I know from the start when i board the plane that apple will leave me but i was just hoping for the best. well, it turned out like what i expected. now it has pass almost half a year since i last talk to her. Hope shes doing well in her studies and everything. hmm mm.. enough of all this sad stuff. I had moved on. just wish that i will be able to get a study loan when i get back sg. i want to go australia to further my studies. LCB culinary school. God bless me!

開不了口

Her name is Ariel. The girl I met in Taiwan.

hmm... how do i start?

We met on April and we exchanged number. We went out a few times. Those were the happy days but after that it slowly faded because her boyfriend was back. we didn't meet and contact since then. Those time was bad and I struggle alot with my feeling. My feeling for her was there but i didn't put it into action because she's attached. I didn't have the guts to ask her regarding her relationship life. I told myself to move on and forget about her but i guess i just didn't do it. keeping myself busy with games and movies are the ways I tried.

I met her today and she enter my life once again. We didn't really have a good talk because her friend was there. After I return to camp, my friends ask whether it's time for me to confess my feeling to her because I don't have much time left here. It's 3 months before october. I don't want to regret for my life but i don't know whether should I take the next step or not.

May God help me in this searching for the right answer.

Dainty Happiness.

whoo.. Today i learned something special and i think is very useful to me.
a LONG advise from our Jia Long aka "Doctor Love". :P



???? @ Taiwan says:
dun Look for Luv
???? @ Taiwan says:
Let it Look for u
???? @ Taiwan says:
datz when it'd be sweetest
iMmaNueL. says:
this sounded very profounded
???? @ Taiwan says:
nope
???? @ Taiwan says:
it is simpLe
???? @ Taiwan says:
dun Look for Luv .. means .. no need to do anything no need go tru shit to go after gaLs or find gaLs
???? @ Taiwan says:
Let Luv Look for u .. means .. u juz Live ur Life as it is .. and wait tiL u faLL ...
???? @ Taiwan says:
one day .. it wiL happen
iMmaNueL. says:
hmm.. sounds logical and interesting..
???? @ Taiwan says:
aiyah ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
Life is that simpLe ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
why ppL wanna go tru so much to go after gaLs ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
then sometimes .. end up wif nth .. or worst stiLL hurt
???? @ Taiwan says:
Luv is very unique one .. when it comes u wanna siam ~ aso cannot siam
iMmaNueL. says:
yeah man.. tt's very true..
???? @ Taiwan says:
aiyah dun worry .. u hv much potentiaL ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
juz be confident .. be urseLf and hang on
iMmaNueL. says:
yeah. i will. thanks for the advise..
???? @ Taiwan says:
no need thank La
???? @ Taiwan says:
actuaLLy many times .. we tink some ppL speak great words ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
but in fact .. itz juz dat we nvr reaLise those "great words" before .. untiL these ppL speak of them
???? @ Taiwan says:
as Life goes on .. we experience .. and these words become "true"
???? @ Taiwan says:
then u can even come up wif ur "great words" to those who haven experience
???? @ Taiwan says:
aiyah i write so much u aso dun understand one
iMmaNueL. says:
haha. i understand.
???? @ Taiwan says:
if u do .. good ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
me and u are 4 yrs apart .. so boh bian i got more experience mah
iMmaNueL. says:
hahaa.
iMmaNueL. says:
maybe you've been thru shit..
???? @ Taiwan says:
wat is shit .. evryone goes tru that La ..
???? @ Taiwan says:
juz differentLy

base on a true story.

hm mm.. thinking about it.. is my eight months in Taiwan. staying here to serve my army isn't that bad. I still remember the first few weeks i was here, i was so homesick but now I'm much more positive about living away from home. It teaches me to be more independent in my own life. I don't own people a living neither do people own me. I would like to work in a oversea country if possible after i pursue my studies. country like "France, Italy or even back to Taiwan". but who knows what will happen in the future. God knows!

anyway, alot of things had happen recently. I heard my first "puppy-love" relationship girlfriend had married this month due to some personal reason. I was shock to hear the news. I wanted to give her my blessing but i couldn't find her on net or what. heh. I guess now when I'm in my 20s, i will see more marriage coming along my way. ha ha.

and also yesterday, I realise the lovely girl i met in friendster is my brother's new girlfriend. haha. ironic right? haha. Thank God i didn't go any further. but my brother really have a good taste. Applause to him! nvm. i will keep searching for mine. ;P

I just finish with one of my korean show that i brought to taiwan. is called " 野蛮王妃". is a really wonderful movie and i cried quite a few times. haha. big man do cry. how i wish i can find a relationship like the show but i know it isn't base on a true story. I want to find a korean or japan wife. I got the thinking that people there are more sentimental than others. haha.

dream on boy! keep searching....

to be continue...

Goodbye My Friend.

Just receive a news that my friend had passed away. I suddenly felt the sadness and imagine how his family will react. losing a son, a brother or a friend. I guess this is his first time staying oversea and his last. having a mindset like everyone of us, waiting for the day to fly back to the place where we belong and ORD but now he just left us without even letting us see him for the last time. although I'm not very close to him but i know he's a good guy with a Gold Heart and he has a bright future waiting for him. I just hope i will see him in heaven when my time is up. life is that fragile.

month of may.

Today is May 9. is a normal day for most people but it isn't for me.
Today is mummy's brithday.
Today is also the day apple and i promised not to leave each other life but i guess this promise can never be fulfilled again. happiness and sadness filled my day. im feeling very troubled recently but no one here seems to understand or care. back in singapore, i still got friends who really care when im down and also my church leaders. went for run in the morning and felt the pain on my chest near my heart. God please bless me and heal me. Ariel's boyfriend is back and i guess we can't go any further but i still want to thank her for the time we spend together although it was very short. well, a emo month for me.